4/20/15 Tips for Change - Self Esteem

Hi Webbers,

I hope all is well. I am busy as usual banging on new ideas and working with clients. My projects are moving along and everything seems to be headed in the right direction.

As I sat at my desk this afternoon. I was looking at my wall and noticed all my inspirational material on the wall.I love reading "Change Your World - Brian Tracy", and "By Changing your thinking - Unknown" I also have a one million dollar bill on my wall (close enough to being real) pure inspiration.

What do you do to keep yourself charged up and moving forward. What about your Self-Esteem? On a scale of 1-10. 1 being the best 10 being the worst. Where are you? Here is some helpful information that may shed some light on your current state. Hopefully these factors will give you a place to start.

Factors That Influence Your Self-Esteem

There are many factors in life that influence your self-esteem. These factors can either build your self-esteem up, or pull you down.

Childhood

Your childhood is one of the main contributing influences to your self-esteem. As you are growing up and your personality and everything else are developing, everyone around you has the potential to influence the person you become - including your self-esteem.

For example, children that grow up in particularly chaotic home environments tend to have lower confidence and self-esteem. Children that grow up in unstable homes tend to carry that burden with them throughout their entire lives.

Society

The pressures of society are a main contributor of low self-esteem. There are so many demands to live a certain way, dress a certain way, have a certain kind of job and act accordingly. These pressures can weigh on you, and succumbing to the pressure can often lead to low self-esteem.

Media

Our absolute obsession with the media, whether it is print ads, television, or social media, contributes to the dilemma of widespread self-esteem issues, especially in today's youth. The ready access of social media especially helps to influence young minds with the pressure to look, act, or otherwise be like celebrities, public figures, or even their peers. It can be hard not to compare yourself to others even as an adult, but young people struggle with this even more than adults.

Beliefs

Some religions and other belief systems can contribute to your sense of self-worth. On the one hand, some religions and belief systems can build you up as a person and fill your life with love and joy. On the other, some religions suggest that people are inherently bad and that you are a “sinner” no matter how you live your life. While no belief system is inherently bad in itself, sometimes these practices and ideas can influence self-esteem.

Friends and Family

The people you spend time with have a big influence on your self-esteem. Your friends can help you build up your confidence, self-image, and self-respect, or they can bring you down. Some people even purposefully bring each other down to build themselves up, whether or not they are aware of what they are doing.

The family that you grew up with, as well as the family that you come home to, can have an effect on your self-esteem as well. Feelings of inadequacy when it comes to providing for your family can add to a low self-esteem, while a family that works together and builds each other up can contribute to a

healthy self-esteem.

Romantic Involvements

All relationships can influence your self-esteem, but romantic relationships tend to have the biggest effect. Being in a happy and loving relationship can boost your self-esteem. On the other hand, a bad relationship can bring you down in so many ways. A bad break-up or being left by a partner can also weigh heavily on your confidence and self-esteem.

Work Environment

You spend so much of your life at work or at school, so it's no wonder that that environment would influence every aspect of your life, including your self-esteem. A stressful and overly demanding job can often contribute to a low self-esteem, while a productive and encouraging workplace can help you grow stronger.

Health

Your overall health can also contribute to your self-esteem. Taking care of yourself, body, mind and spirit can strengthen all aspects of yourself including your self-esteem.

Overall, there are so many factors that can influence your self-esteem. Every part of your life has influence, and therefore has power over your self-esteem. But, the person with the most control over your self-esteem is yourself. Practice giving yourself good messages; avoid self-bullying in order to build up your self-esteem.

I hope this has helped you to shape and change your future. I believe our lives were meant to be lived by our design. I am here to help you become the person you want to be. I want to be your coach and be your partner in designing the life you want to lead.

Contact me today to design your new life.

After all it is your life, live it by your design.

Tim Thomas

Life Coach

A Life by Design Company

PO Box 4327

Manchester, NH 03108

Tel: 603-682-4980

info@aionnh.com

www.2-help-u.com

https://www.facebook.com/Thomas.Training

http://thomatf.tumblr.com/

Sundays Tip For Change 3/15/15

Hi Webbers,

Sunday is here and I have to say I was an absolute lazy bum this weekend. I spent time with my family and my daughter. I figured we can get back at it on Monday. I am at this stage in life finding that giving back and gratitude are really what life is about. I have always tried to help. However I always felt like I was going against the grain. I was always against my nature. The nature of my true self. It was like a heavy coat I would put on to show the world forget the mask. I am working at striping away the layers. I am getting there and I am on the path.

The big achievement this week is passing my coaching course on working with woman through RMT. YAY me!

This weeks Tip For Change:

Tips to Help Overcome Shyness and Social Awkwardness


Feeling shy or awkward in certain situations is understandable. Don't we all have a little nervousness before we go talk to that guy or girl, or get sweaty palms before giving a speech? For some, though, shyness and social awkwardness may not be circumstantial, but constant. This can be very frustrating and hard to overcome, but there are some things you can do to help overcome your shyness and approach people in social situations. Here are some tips.

Learn to Laugh

There's something about laughter that makes everyone feel more comfortable. This is why "ice breaker" activities at parties are often designed to get the participants laughing. So don't be afraid to laugh at someone's jokes, or learn a few funny lines yourself (not canned "pick-up" lines, but clever observations or comments).

Force Yourself to Stay

Sometimes, shy people feel so uncomfortable in a social situation that they just want it to end; they just want to get away. Consciously resist this impulse. Tell yourself to stand your ground, stay put, and interact. Remember, the other person is not going to breathe fire; he or she just wants to have a conversation and get to know you.

Learn to be Comfortable with Silence

Social situations can feel especially awkward if you are uncomfortable with mutual silence. This may trigger shy people to "babble" to fill the silence, which then makes them feel even more awkward because they feel like what they're saying is silly or nonsensical. So be cool - some silence between people is okay. In fact, it helps give the other person a chance to think before he or she speaks. The person you're speaking with will appreciate this!

Stretch

Just like physical stretching, socially and psychologically stretching can be somewhat uncomfortable, even painful. But also like physical stretching, it's necessary. If your first instinct is to say "No" when someone asks you to do something, stop and think first. Tell the person you will get back to him or her if you aren't sure. This will give you some time to pluck up your courage and say "Yes."

When to Seek a Professional

There is a point when simple shyness and social awkwardness may be an actual disorder. Social anxiety disorder and social phobia are real disorders that may need the help of a professional. The difference between shyness and these disorders is how much it affects your life.

For example, if you are so shy and embarrassed by just the thought of having to introduce yourself to others or attend a party that you go to great lengths to avoid the situation, it might be a social disorder. When it's social anxiety or phobia, you have trouble living a normal and productive life due to your social fears.

THANK YOU!

Webbers I hope you enjoyed reading this and it has brought some ideas or changes you can incorporate into your life. Please pass it on if you know someone that this could benefit.

Isn't it about time you live your life your way. After all it is your life, live it by your design.

T

Tim Thomas

A Life by Design Company

PO Box 4327

Manchester, NH 03108

Tel: 603-682-4980

info@aionnh.com

www.2-help-u.com

https://www.facebook.com/Thomas.Training

http://thomatf.tumblr.com/

Thursday 2/12/15

Morning Webbers,


Time for more snow! Nice hope you are up and moving about. I am frustrated at the moment. It seems my it has updated my inbox and now I cannot search for my emails :( hope they fix it soon.)

In the meantime here are some tip on building your confidence.

Build Confidence in Interpersonal Relationships - Top Tips


For some people, self-confidence with regard to personal relationships is challenging. You may find that you have confidence in many other areas of your life - your business, talents, and so forth - but lack the confidence to have successful personal relationships. For some, this is due to past experiences - once bitten, twice shy, so to speak. For others, it just seems to be how they're wired; they just can't be the social butterfly they wish they could be.

If any of this describes you, read on for some tips and suggestions that may help.

Recognize You're Not Alone

Pretending like you don't have trouble with confidence is not going to help. You'd be surprised at

how many people who seem naturally born confident actually took time and effort to learn the art of self-confidence in their relationships. If there weren't a growing number of people in need of self-confidence, there wouldn't be a growing field of confidence coaches and life coaches to help!

Consider Coaching

You might consider becoming a client of a confidence or life coach. These coaches specialize in helping people realize their potential, both professionally and personally. There's no shame in seeking advice, whether from a friend or a professional.

Your Contribution

If you feel insecure when you think of your interpersonal relationships (or when you think of starting one), it might help to remember that you have something of value to contribute to that relationship. Lack of confidence may stem from a sense that relationships are only about you pleasing the other person, or getting him or her to like you. However, it's important to realize that you have something to contribute to the relationship which will benefit the other person - you!

Flaws Happen

Remember that both you and the person with whom you are in a relationship have flaws. Everyone does. People who lack confidence in relationships tend to walk on eggshells, afraid they will say or do something to cause the other person to turn against them. But truthfully, someone who really likes or loves you is not going to ditch you just because you said one off-color thing or made one mistake. And if they do, you didn't need them to begin with!

Silence the Negative Inner Voice

First, you have to recognize it - listen for a few days to your inner voice. What's it saying? Do you hear, "You're not good enough," "No one would ever put up with you," or "I just can't go over and talk to him/her?" Once you begin to hear these thoughts, it's time to take action and change them. Often, such negative self-talk is a habit and you don't even realize you're doing it. You have to forge new habits of positive self-talk instead. Remember that you have something to contribute to a relationship and the right person will be glad to have you as an addition to his or her life!

Have a great day Webbers!

T

It is your life, live it by your design.

Tim Thomas

A Life by Design Company

PO Box 4327

Manchester, NH 03108

Tel: 603-682-4980

info@aionnh.com

www.2-help-u.com

https://www.facebook.com/Thomas.Training

http://thomatf.tumblr.com/

Happy New Year

Hi Webbers I know I am a bit early. All being the same Happy New Year!

What are you doing today to be ready for the new year? My wife and I were having the conversation just the other day. I have expanded my business for 2015 and am working on finalizing my working with women course with RMT (Robbins Madaness Training). I have a couple of memberships that need to be renewed and I am constantly working on reducing my gut. I do have a few courses to get under way as well. I find myself constantly striving to do better. I am just not happy with where my station is in life yet. I am still hungry from what I can see. We are never too old to learn new things and push ahead in life no matter what the obstacle.

As a coach we are constantly striving to move forward. Okay is not acceptable we want exceptional from everything we do. We strive for our committed clients as hard as we do for ourselves. Below is some information that I can help someone work on with a client and help them reach another level in relationships.

Here is some information that may be of some value.

Build Confidence in Interpersonal Relationships - Top Tips


For some people, self-confidence with regard to personal relationships is challenging. You may find that you have confidence in many other areas of your life - your business, talents, and so forth - but lack the confidence to have successful personal relationships. For some, this is due to past experiences - once bitten, twice shy, so to speak. For others, it just seems to be how they're wired; they just can't be the social butterfly they wish they could be.

If any of this describes you, read on for some tips and suggestions that may help.

Recognize You're Not Alone

Pretending like you don't have trouble with confidence is not going to help. You'd be surprised at how many people who seem naturally born confident actually took time and effort to learn the art of self-confidence in their relationships. If there weren't a growing number of people in need of self-confidence, there wouldn't be a growing field of confidence coaches and life coaches to help!

Consider Coaching

You might consider becoming a client of a confidence or life coach. These coaches specialize in helping people realize their potential, both professionally and personally. There's no shame in seeking advice, whether from a friend or a professional.

Your Contribution

If you feel insecure when you think of your interpersonal relationships (or when you think of starting one), it might help to remember that you have something of value to contribute to that relationship. Lack of confidence may stem from a sense that relationships are only about you pleasing the other person, or getting him or her to like you. However, it's important to realize that you have something to contribute to the relationship which will benefit the other person - you!

Flaws Happen

Remember that both you and the person with whom you are in a relationship have flaws. Everyone does. People who lack confidence in relationships tend to walk on eggshells, afraid they will say or do something to cause the other person to turn against them. But truthfully, someone who really likes or loves you is not going to ditch you just because you said one off-color thing or made one mistake. And if they do, you didn't need them to begin with!

Silence the Negative Inner Voice

First, you have to recognize it - listen for a few days to your inner voice. What's it saying? Do you hear, "You're not good enough," "No one would ever put up with you," or "I just can't go over and talk to him/her?" Once you begin to hear these thoughts, it's time to take action and change them. Often, such negative self-talk is a habit and you don't even realize you're doing it. You have to forge new habits of positive self-talk instead. Remember that you have something to contribute to a relationship and the right person will be glad to have you as an addition to his or her life!

EXERCISE OF THE DAY:

Take care my friends.

THANK YOU!

The finest compliment I could ever receive is a referral from my friends and clients.

It is your life, live it by your design.

T

Tim Thomas

A Life by Design Company

PO Box 4327

Manchester, NH 03108

Tel: 603-682-4980

info@aionnh.com

www.2-help-u.com

https://www.facebook.com/Thomas.Training

http://thomatf.tumblr.com/

Monday 12/8/14

Hi Webbers,

I hope life is going well. This week has started off great. I am on vacation. Some things I am working on. My  RMT - Working with women certificate the last of my RMT Strategic intervention courses. I has been a long two years and one that I will never regret. I have complete Core 100, 200 and Total Breakthrough. I have been busy and some of the material has challenged me. I enjoy being part of the RMT community.

I am also working on my business and reworking a new logo. I usually do them myself. This time however I shipped them off to a firm to have them done. I got to have six designers work on a concept. That in of itself was a cool process to be part of. I will post it when the project is complete.

The final project I have is I purchased a YB12 Consultancy. I am an independent agent and can sell their program anywhere in the world. Looks cool I am still in the training phase and should be up and running soon. Look forward to more information on that in the coming weeks. You can find out more Click Here.

Among everything else I still get to have a great time with my daughter our weekend movie adventure was HOW TO DRAIN YOUR DRAGON 2. We love to watch movies and enjoy most of our picks. It is amazing the questions she will ask and it brings me great pleasure to see how happy she is to spend time with me. Today made me feel horrible. We were leaving to take her to her Grandmothers house. She said are you going to work I said no I was staying home. She said " Can i stay with you, I won't be a bother." I was so crushed I had to tell her she would not be a bother.  Man I want to spend more time with her she definitely can teach me a few lessons on life.

Today I am enjoying myself. I cleaned up the failed ice rink. Next year it is a have too. We were to late for it this year when I got started. Then I worked on the dollhouse. Now I am working on myself and the business.

My tip for the day #1:

What change in your thinking has to take place?

I am here to help you live your life by your design. Aren't you worth it? Contact me today to earn the success you deserve.

T

THANK YOU!

The finest compliment I could ever receive is a referral from my friends and clients.

Live Life by Design.

Tim Thomas

A Life by Design Company

PO Box 4327

Manchester, NH 03108

Tel: 603-682-4980

info@aionnh.com

www.2-help-u.com

https://www.facebook.com/Thomas.Training

http://thomatf.tumblr.com/