I can't believe it is Monday already. I spent a lot of my weekend working on projects. I am busier than I have been in a long time. In turn I am tired. I had a lot of appointments today that required driving so I am worn out at this moment. I love getting out my tips for change and look forward to it no matter how tired I am.
I hope you will enjoy this edition on how to maintain your self esteem.
Dumped? How to Maintain Your Self-Esteem
A bad break-up can be a major blow to your happiness, but getting dumped can really affect your self-esteem. It is hard not to succumb to the sadness and self-loathing that getting dumped can bring on. But after you're all cried out, how do you maintain your self-esteem?
Take a Breath
First of all, take a deep breath. Sometimes the shock of being dumped can make it feel like you're
drowning. So breathe and keep your head above water.
It's Not You
Whether your partner dumped you because of their own reasons or because of something they feel you did, know that ultimately it isn't your fault. There is no point in trying to find blame or pointing fingers at yourself, which will only serve to make you feel worse.
Remember You
Ultimately, you are the most important person here. You need to focus on yourself and remember that you are a wonderful person who is deserving of love and respect. If you can't give yourself that love and respect, how can you expect anyone else to? Take this time to remember yourself and think of all the reasons why you love yourself.
Get Some Perspective
Sometimes it helps to look at things from an outside perspective. Imagine that one of your friends or loved ones is in the same position that you are in right now. Would you want them to blame themselves, or feel that it is their fault? Would you think that they deserve to wallow in that much misery and give up their self-worth?
If your friend or loved one doesn't deserve to be treated that way, neither do you. Remember that.
Find Someone to Talk To
Don't suffer in silence. You are more likely to dig yourself deeper into despair and let your self-esteem slip. Instead, ask a friend or loved one to spend some time with you, and talk it out. Not only will it feel better to have a sounding board, but they will be able to hand you some much-needed perspective so you don't find fault in every detail.
Talk Yourself Up
Make a list of all the things that you love about yourself, and all of the good things you have to offer not just someone else, but also yourself. You can start with physical attributes, but make sure to include things about your personality. After you make this list, read it often as a reminder of how wonderful you are. If it helps, try reading them out loud.
Treat Yourself
To celebrate you, treat yourself to something special. Something small such as a home spa treatment or a run can do wonders for how you feel. Anything you can do that makes you smile and is healthy, that lets you remember how good life is will help.
Don't Let Go
Whatever you do, keep your head above water and don't let go of yourself. Do not allow what
someone else says or does diminish your self-esteem, because you are worth more than that. You are important even when you are not part of a couple.
Being dumped is hard; there is no doubt about that. You are strong enough, however, to keep your head up and move on. Find solace in the fact that you are a wonderful, beautiful person and no one can take that away unless you let them. You can maintain your self-esteem by holding on to you, no matter what.
I tell you I wish I knew some of these tools when I was younger. I wonder how much further ahead I might be in life.
After all it is
your life, live it by your design.
THANK YOU!
The finest compliment I could ever receive is a referral.
Tim Thomas
Life Coach
A Life by Design Company
Tel: 603-682-4980
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